Encouragement from Him

From Philippians 2:1-4...
"If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."

I was just thinking how this is the purpose of the blog...if we are united with Christ, we should not be bogged down in the sorrow of sin, but we should be shining as lights for Him and be encouraging to others! Someone spoke to me today about how rehashing my sin to others is not an encouragement, but is in fact discouraging and can even be a stumbling block.

So I want to renew my purpose for having this blog be an encouragement to one another--ya'll are admins, so feel free to edit or delete my posts if they are not glorifying to God! But girls, look at how much the verses say we have received--encouragement, comfort, fellowship, tenderness and compassion...how can we not be filled with gratefulness and joy for what God is doing?? Let's purpose to seek Him wholeheartedly!!

Minor testimony, but still wanted to share it...I had an interview on Wednesday for an events planning training program, and one of the parts of the interview was to fill out a personality survey. On the survey, we had to rank ourselves 1-5 on various categories, then the interviewer asked about them. So, near the end, there were 2 categories of "how religious are you?" and "how politically liberal are you?". I ranked myself, then waited for the question on those. I had to pray though, because I could just imagine myself rationalizing, 'well, I put a 5 but really, if something falls on a Sunday, I could make an exception. And I'm not very politically liberal, but what does that mean anyway? If you have a gay wedding to do, I guess I would just quietly not do it. Not really a big deal.'--I tend to try to please people at any cost. So I prayed God would help me be bold and non-compromising and when she went over the categories, she said "Oh ok you're very religious and conservative. That's actually good to be on that side of the extreme" and kept going. Anyway, just a little praise for God preparing my heart to stand for Him.

Bits from The Problem of Pain

I've been reading The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis, and I wanted to share a few things with you from that:

Confession:

As we've been hearing, we must confess our sin. But when we confess, we tend to detach ourselves from the sin. I know I do: "Ok, now I've confessed, and everybody knows, and everybody's forgiven me--and guess what, a lot of other people have been doing it too! So now, as long as I change, I'm all good." When we repent and confess, God covers our guilt, but we can't pretend that it never happened. We shouldn't dwell in guilt, but where we would have seen guilt, we can't see nothing. We have to see God's righteousness and his forgiveness.

The will:

Many of us are realizing that we have to give things up. Some of these things were sinful, but many of them were just things that were too distracting for us, or weren't in God's plan for us. I thought this quote was really applicable:

"In order to submit the will to God, we must have a will and that will must have objects. Christian renunciation does not mean stoic "Apathy," but a readiness to prefer God to inferior ends which are in themselves lawful. Hence the Perfect Man brought to Gethsemane a will, and a strong will, to escape suffering and death if such escape were compatible with the Father's will, combined with a perfect readiness for obedience if it were not."

 When we give things up we usually aren't going to stop desiring them; if we did, there would be no sacrifice. But we have to be willing to do God's will anyways. (By the way, this doesn't mean that we should feed these desires, even the lawful ones, if we know they aren't God's will--why would we just make it harder on ourselves?)

Goodness does not equal kindness:

Lewis observes that today's society tends to equate goodness with kindness, or mercy. Thus, almost any other sin is treated as ok (if not theoretically, at least practically). Lust, laziness, cheating, whatever, are fine--as long as they doesn't hurt anyone. This was an important insight for me because I've struggled with just that thought--"Well, it doesn't hurt anyone, so what's the big deal? I mean, of course a Christian shouldn't do it, but does it really matter for an unbeliever?" At least two things are wrong with this:

1. God's law is always right and true. We shouldn't condone any sin--even ones that aren't inherently cruel. God hates laziness just as much as he does cruelty; he hates hypocrisy as much as he does meanness. 

2. "...Plato rightly taught that virtue is one. You cannot be kind unless you have all the other virtues. If, being cowardly, conceited and slothful, you have never yet done a fellow creature great mischief, that is only because your neighbour's welfare has not yet happened to conflict with your safety, self-approval, or ease." 

We still may not be able to convince a non-Christian that these other things are just as evil as cruelty, but we at least don't have to approve of it--including indirectly. In a book by George MacDonald, a mysterious, old princess who represents God tells a boy who has seen her "'something not to do...If you should hear anyone speak about me, never to laugh or make fun of me.'

'Oh, ma'am!' exclaimed Curdie, shocked that she should think such a request needful. 

'Stop, stop,' she went on. 'People hereabout sometimes tell very odd and in fact ridiculous stories of an old woman who watches what is going on, and occasionally interferes. They mean me, though what they say is often great nonsense. Now what I want of you is not to laugh, or side with them in any way; because they will take that to mean you don't believe there is any such person a bit more than they do. Now that would not be the case -- would it Curdie?'"

I've been convicted that I have done this very thing--and it's even easier to do when it comes to sin. When classmates tell me how they cheated in some class last semester, I probably don't have to rebuke them, but I certainly should not laugh. 

(P.S. If you need something to read, these are both great books! The one by MacDonald is The Princess and Curdie, sequel to The Princess and the Goblin. I'm almost positive our church library has the Problem of Pain (with the other church books) as well as The Princess and the Goblin/Curdie (in the school YA section, last time I checked), and I have them as well. Just to warn you, both books have some things that we wouldn't agree with, so you have to read critically, but they are still chalk full of very helpful things as well!) :)

The pointing finger

Hi gals,

This morning in our reading I was struck by the verse in Isaiah 58 "If you do away with...the pointing finger...THEN your light will rise in the darkness" (vs 9,10). Then on the way to work, I heard Romans 2:1-4 "You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. ²Now we know that God's judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. ³So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God's judgment? ⁴Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance?" And it all came together.

As you all know, revival has been going on in our church for some time now. And I hope and pray that we have all been a part of it. However, I have to confess that I have fallen into the habit of "Quenching the Spirit"--even mentally it is a dangerous thing. There have been many people who have had radical change in their lives, and yet I find myself thinking, "This will never last. I know they will fall back into their old habits." Or worse, when they bring a good word or a good example, thinking "Who are they to tell me what to do or how to live? Just (insert amount of time) ago they were living a much worse life than me. What can they have to offer?"

Girls, I know that we all tend to fall into this mentality. Women are especially vindictive and judgmental. But what does God's word say..."you who pass judgment do the SAME things." Who are we to say whether or not someone has changed? Is it not possible that we are just jealous of the change in their life, and we feel upset that they are actually doing BETTER than we are spiritually? Rather than judging them, we should look and rejoice in what God is doing in their lives. I was thinking about the adulterous woman this morning. What worse sin can there be than to commit adultery...And yet, what did Jesus do? He told her, "neither do I condemn you." Who are we to cast that first stone? Are we guiltless? Have we lived such holy lives that we are able to spiritually discern whether others have come to know Christ for the first time or anew?

When I think about Isaiah I get an image in my mind...standing there and pointing..."saved, not saved, saved, not saved...true repentance, faking it." But for some reason, that finger is never pointed at me, examining and judging my OWN life. I pray that when it does, that I can say with confidence, "Saved!" But when I am so busy deciding about the salvation of others, I am too busy to look at my own life. When we have stopped "the pointing finger" and have looked at our own lives, have accepted God's gracious and MIGHTY work in our church, THEN, then and only then can we have our light shine powerfully in the darkness. God is not calling for us to judge others in this time of revival. Yes, we must be wise and we must be aware that Satan is actively at work. Yes, there are those whose revival is fake...But I know that I err on the side of being over-judgmental, of being to certain that everyone else has a fake revival. Yes, be on guard! Stand firm in the faith! Do not be naiive. But give people the benefit of the doubt. If they are wolves in sheep's clothing, it will become apparent. But you cannot learn how to be holy in your own life if you are shining the light of God's grace in everyone's life but your own.

I know that there is much more complexity to this whole situation than first appears. But, let's believe that God is a great God, that He can save and radically change those who were only a month or two ago living in great sin. He is God! He is mighty! He is great! And He is so far above us that we cannot doubt His work. Do not doubt His grace...or "show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience." Let's take MORE time to examine our own lives. I know that I don't want others pointing their fingers at me and saying "she will never last." I want encouragement and support and prayer that my life will continue to change so I can serve God more.

And one last thing ladies. Let us not think that we can pretend and cover this feeling. I know we ALL know when someone is covering up true feelings...if in our heart we are judgmental people, it WILL come across in our actions. And we will not escape God's judgment!

I hope that this is a reminder for us all. I know that some of you truly do have gracious hearts that are so faithful to build others up. And I praise God for you! I know that I personally need to work on having faith that God can change even the worst person! I hope this is an encouragement to live more faithfully before God. Praise Him!

Peace, Peace

From our reading this morning in Isaiah 57...


:2 "Those who walk uprightly enter into peace; they find rest as they lie in death."

:10 "[But you wicked people], you were wearied by all your ways, but you would not say, 'It is hopeless.' You found renewal of your strength and so you did not faint."

:11 "Whom have you so dreaded and feared that you have been false to me...?"

:12 "I will expose your righteousness and your works, and they will not benefit you."

:17 "I was enraged by his sinful greed; I punished him, and hid my face in anger, yet he kept on in his willful ways."


If we are looking for true rest and peace, it will not be found in anything on earth. True peace comes from walking uprightly--and, even then, we may only find real rest in death! Life on earth is not promised to be perfect or smooth sailing. Things won't go perfectly our way, but God has His reasons--and, in the middle of it all, He promises rest.

I want to share with you the warning I found in verse 10 though...when we see our wicked ways, and we get tired of them, it is not enough. These wicked people found strength that they didn't know they had and continued on in their muck. God calls us to get out of the muck!! He calls us to live for Him. Have you confessed 80% of sin? Someone recently told me that they had confessed a sin in part, but thought that the elders got 'the general gist of it' and 'there's no need to go into all the specifics'. I pressed my friend as to whether or not they thought that was real confession--and then they told me that if they confessed every detail, it would hurt the other person involved. Girls, is that what we're doing when we confess? Making excuses, trying to make sin sound better, not wanting to let go of everything? That's why some confession is not enough! We will never get out of the muck if we only confess part of it! Comparing it to the analogy of when we are saved, our eyes are opened to a room full of manure--what if the lights were still dimmed? We might be able to shovel out most of the manure, but it is only with full light that we will be able to see all and, with the grace of God, clean the whole room! Do not fall into the trap of partial confession--Satan will renew your strength to sin more!

In verse 11, my train of thought continues. Who is it that we are so scared of that we do not turn to Christ? Who is it that causes us to be false to Him? Are you scared that if you confess to being deceitful, your parents won't trust you or let you do anything? Are you scared that if you confess to sexual immorality, you may lose your boyfriend? Are you scared that if you confess to cheating at school, your friends won't look at you as intelligent? Are you scared that if you confess to not truly being a Christian, your friends will look down on you? There are so many things I have been scared of in the past. So many people I knew I would disappoint and hurt if I confessed certain sins. Two things I have learned though--imperfect people love and forgive. God, who is perfect, loves even more and forgives any sin we truly confess and repent of. Isn't that amazing??

Speaking of being scared, verse 12 is a harsh warning. God promises to expose our 'righteousness' and 'works'--but when He does, it will not benefit us! Think about it, ladies--think about all the works we've done. Will they ultimately be for His glory? Think about our righteousness--how righteous are we? Are we striving toward holiness? If God came today, and saw our pretension and superficiality, would He be content with that as righteousness? Would He look at all our works that were done to get praise or the attention of that guy or to look better, and say, "Well done, my good and faithful servant"? His standards are sooo much higher than ours!

:17 Sinful greed...willful ways. What are we greedy for? More worldliness? Have we submitted or are we continuing to walk in our willful ways? He promises to punish and hide His face--trust me, we don't want either one!

:21 "There is no peace...for the wicked". If you have no peace, pray to God and seek His mercy!!

"This is All That I Can Give...That's My Everything"

Tonight at Beautiful Minds, Sharon said something to the effect of, how much do we need God? How much do we want Him in our lives? A little bit of need? Or do we really truly NEED Him? Are we able to say to Him, God take all? Like the widow who gave her two coins, are we able to give Him everything we have, no matter how pitiful??

Then I go to the blog Bring The Rain (audreycaroline.blogspot.com) and this song by the David Crowder Band comes on:
Lord I'm tired
So tired from walking
And Lord I'm so alone
And Lord the dark
Is creeping in
Creeping up
To swallow me
I think I'll stop
Rest here a while

And didn't You see me cry'n?
And didn't You hear me call Your name?
Wasn't it You I gave my heart to?
I wish You'd remember
Where you sat it down

Chorus:
And this is all that I can say right now
i know it's not much
And this is all that I can give
yeah that's my everything

Bridge:
I didn't notice
You were standing here
I didn't know that
That was You holding me
I didn't notice
You were cry'n too
I didn't know that
That was You washing my feet


See the chorus? Our lives are nothing. There is not much we can bring to Christ. We don't have some great gift to bring. All we have is our pitiful lives. But He wants us to bring that--to bring our everything.

I am only starting to see a little piece of what God requires of me. Girls, what are you willing to give up? Consider the things He may ask of you:

*He may ask you to be single for the rest of your life. Can you submit that to Him?

*He may not grant you children. Can you submit that to Him?

*He may direct you to be a missionary in another country. Can you submit that to Him?

*He may take people away from you that you love. A breakup, a friend forsaking Christ, a child dying. Can you submit that to Him?


Tonight we learned about how Oswald Chambers was in a relationship with a girl he loved for eight years, and then gave her up because she was not God's will for him. Would you be willing to give up someone you loved for Christ? Completely give up your wishes in order to be in submission to Him?


SURRENDER ALL AND BE BLESSED!!

Hopeful...

I have been thinking a lot about how easy it is to get depressed because of sin, and feel unable to move on or change. Especially going back into school (or into a work world, or any unfamiliar setting), it's easy to be afraid of the world--will they just pull me down? Look at all this sin; how could I ever get out of it?? I've really been convicted of this lately, and spoken to about it--GOD is able to give us all the power we need! But here are some verses:

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you" (Deuteronomy 31:6)

God promises to be with us as long as we desire to serve Him--He is not going to let us go! But we must cling to Him! Press into spiritual discipleship, read His Word, memorize verses! He promises to protect us and be with us!!

"You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place." (Revelation 2:3-5)

Ok this is more of a warning: Don't leave the revival in July and August! Persevere for the glory of Christ, and He will bless you! Don't forsake the love you have for Christ now. How easy it is to be dulled by the world!

I wanted to share these last two verses as encouragement:

"For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin." (Hebrews 4:15)

"And at the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, 'Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?'—which means, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" (Mark 15:34)

Christ knows what you are going through--He was tempted to feel depressed, to go against His Father's authority, to not want the will of the Father. Yet through it, He did the will of the Father. And think about this--sometimes I feel like God has forsaken me and then I realize my sin is inhibiting me from talking to and communing with Him. But Christ was on the cross, TRULY forsaken, like we could never know, for OUR sake. Living in a way that pleases Christ is glorifying to Him and so small compared to the great work He did for us on the cross!!


P.S. I was really convicted because I had a couple words of each of these verses in my head but didn't have them memorized and didn't know really where they were in the Bible...thank goodness for technology and biblegateway.com, but phew I really need to memorize!!

Love you all! Happy Monday!

Burnt Offerings

Hey girls,

In our reading the other day we read "I will not sacrifice to the Lord my God burnt offerings that cost me nothing."

It made me think of 2 things:

1. Our offerings have to cost us something. Confession is difficult, yes, but not really costly. Maybe our reputation or people's view of us, but obedience is what really makes is hurt. You have to say no when you want to say yes, to die to self, to take up the cross. Wow. That makes confession look almost easy.
2. They have to burn. I keep thinking about putting things up on the altar, but we can't just set them there and walk off. That makes it way too easy to come back and try to sneak things back off. We have to burn them, cut off all contact, make a clean break, replace them with something new, leaving nothing of the old. That's painful.

Praise God he gives grace! I was talking to Mrs. Perry the other day, and we would be so lost, so exhausted and unable if it weren't for the power of the Holy Spirit. But to get that: disciplined, holy life.

My Heart is Deceitful

"The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it? "
(Jeremiah 17:9)


MY heart is deceitful. My heart deceives others, and my heart deceives my mind into thinking that I know best, that even sin is ok because it's with 'right motives', that it's not really sin.

Above all things--above the feelings of love, above the desire to serve God, above the right inclinations. More than anything, the heart is deceitful. What a scary thought!!

Beyond cure--our hearts are not going to change by any effort of our own. It is a daily effort to fight evil and a daily prayer that God will change our hearts. We have no idea the depths of the depravity of our own hearts!!

"Who can understand it?"--the moment we start thinking our hearts are not deceitful; the moment we start thinking we are strong enough to stand on our own in moments of weakness or temptation; the moment we think we are doing 'fine'...that is when our hearts are most deceitful. We can not truly understand or trust a person who is always lying, and similarly, we can not truly understand or trust our hearts! Instead, we must trust God!


I cannot trust what my heart convinces me that I want. I cannot rest in being 'fine' if that is what my heart tells me I am. My heart is deceitful. I can only trust God and obey Him. Trust and obey...

Why can't I be like that vase?

Just really quickly, cause Jenna's post reminded me of it--

Lately I've wanted to ask (using the pottery metaphor) "Why can't I be as beautiful or useful as that vase?" I see the work that God's doing in others, and I want to be like the best. Now, for one thing, judging some to be "the best" is a problem in the first place, because only God sees the heart. But I think there are people who we see are on a "higher ground" than we are. And it's right to want to be on that higher ground, but not enviously. Not because we want to be among the elite, but because we want to know God more and be used by him more. I don't want to just be like Simon the sorcerer who wanted to buy the apostle's power.

I have to remember that, often times, these people who I see are living on a higher plane than I started higher or earlier in this revival--I can't expect overnight change without the same hard work and perseverance (time!). So getting there takes work. Practical godly living (alright, this I know I can do with God's help), but also immersion in spiritual thinking--reading the Bible, godly books, praying, memorizing, etc (Um, but that's going to take the time I want to spend doing something mindless and useless. Yep. And God will help you do it, and God will even help you love it, as you know from experience). And it also takes perseverance--time. But most of all, it takes the power of the Holy Spirit. All my works--and certainly all my attempts at works--are in vain if they aren't done in his power. And if I'm truly living for God, he'll bring me to higher and higher and higher ground! And that's so exciting!

I just thought of something.

We can be dissatisfied with being where we are. That's not very helpful, since we can't do anything about our current condition--only our future condition. And then we just get depressed, because we see no hope.

But we should be dissatisfied with staying where we are. That, we (with God's help) can do something about! With that, there is hope! And with faith, we can be sure of what we hope for! What a wonderful promise!

From Our Reading...

This morning in Isaiah 45:9...

"Does the clay say to the potter, 'what are you making?'"

So right before this, there is a woe to those who quarrel with God. But I wanted to apply it to me. I realized there are several ways that I wrongly ask this question. It sometimes is in the form of an argument with God--"God, why are you making me like this? I wanted to be THIS. I wanted things to turn out this way." It would be as if the clay spoke to the potter saying, "A brown vase, really? I wanted to be a blue teacup. I think I would be much better suited for something delicate, pretty, and attention-grabbing. Brown vases are just functional and boring. No one looks at them or compliments them, and they don't have any fun. You're obviously doing this wrong!"

Or what if the clay is constantly questioning the potter? "What are you doing NOW? Are you done yet? What's next? What detail are you going to carve right there? Are you sure you wanted to make that cut?" Constant questioning of God's plan and God's will is mistrust in God. I need to be quiet and do what He commands and trust that He has a plan for me that He will work out for my good. Instead of always trying to see what is around the next corner, I need to focus on God's will for me now. Glorify God in the mundane!

My other thought on this is how the clay could be asking the potter about other pieces of pottery. "What about that lump? What are you making it into? I only see a lump of clay, I don't think it can be made into anything beautiful. Or that cup. It's starting to come together, but I don't see it ever changing anymore. I think it'll just have to stay undone." Do you ever question God's work in others? Especially during this revival, when we are hearing the encouragement to not quench the Spirit's fire. Don't stop someone else from being moldable for Him! Encourage them in their walk! Be excited at the change in someone else! This is really difficult for me, but we are called to trust Him, not people.

Is there a right way to question our Maker? I think so. We are to "work out (our) salvation with fear and trembling"(Philippians 2:12). We are to ask Him which way He wants us to go. God, how can I be more humble and moldable for Your purposes? Please give me that humility and help me to be totally bendable according to Your will. Show me Your purpose for me today, and help me to live in a way that pleases You. I don't know exactly what You have for me, but I am trusting You that You will fulfill your good plan in accordance with Your will."

And lastly, a verse we all know but a good friend shared with me at church yesterday:

" 'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" (Jeremiah 29:11)

Let's start our week out trusting God!!

Dependence through Song

Hi ladies,

I thought both the following songs are encouraging, and show our need for dependence on Him. Try to listen if you get the chance! :)

Never let 'em see you when you're breaking
Never let 'em see you when you fall
That's how we live and that's how we try
Tell the world you've got it all together
Never let them see what's underneath
Cover it up with a crooked smile
But it only lasts for a little while

[CHORUS:]There's no such thing as perfect people
There's no such thing as a perfect life
So come as you are, broken and scared
Lift up your heart and be amazed
And be changed by a perfect God
Suddenly it's like a weight is lifted
When you hear the words that you are loved
He knows where you are and where you've been
And you never have to go there again

Who lived and died to give new life
To heal our imperfections
So look up and see out let grace be enough

By a perfect God [5x]
Be changed by a perfect God
Be changed

(by Natalie Grant)


Savior, please take my hand .
I work so hard, I live so fast.
This life begins, then it ends.
And then I do the best that I can, but I don't know how long I'll last.

I try to be so tough, but I'm just not strong enough.
I can't do this alone, God I need you to hold on to me.
I try to be good enough, but I'm nothing without your love.
Savior, please keep saving me.
Savior, please help me stand.

I fall so hard, I fade so fast. Will you begin right where I end?
And be the God of all I am because you're all I have.
Hallelujah!
Everything you are to me is everything I'll ever need.
and i am learning to believe cause you're the one who's saving me.

(by Josh Wilson)

A Bold Start, and A Face Wash

I'm reading Shadow of the Almighty, a biography written by Elizabeth Elliot about her missionary husband Jim Elliot. I'm sure many of you have read it before. Just starting chapter 3, and already there's so many inspiring things.


In a note Jim wrote to his sister Jane, 1941: Begin each day with private reading of the Word and prayer. Bunyan has said well, "Sin will keep you from this Book, or this Book will keep you from sin." From the very first, as you begin [high school] give out gospel tracts to those you meet. Make a bold start-it's easier this way, rather than trying to begin halfway through. Memorize scripture in the streetcar. Buy up the time! It's costly because it's so fleeting.

About his morning Bible reading and prayer Jim wrote:

None of it gets to be old stuff. For it is Christ in print, the Living Word. We wouldn't think of rising in the morning without a face wash, but we often neglect that purgative cleansing of the Word of the Lord. It wakes us up to responsibility.

Quiet Yourself

I don't know how many of you have ever experienced this, but this morning, from the moment I woke up until I left the house, my mind was in turmoil. I sat down and tried to pray and do devotions, but every couple of seconds my mind would wander off...I have been having some issues with a work project. And as I sat and was distracted and could not focus, I realized how important it had become for me to have time with God...and how important it is to quiet our minds before him.

I know, girls, that I struggle with quietness. And I'm sure that many of you also struggle with it...shutting my mouth and just listening can be the hardest thing for me. But this morning, as I was struggling to calm my mind, it really struck me how important it is to LISTEN to God. And so, instead of praying and asking God for things, just take a little time to worship him and to let him speak to you. God already knows our hearts and our needs...but if all we ever do is talk to him, we never give him the chance to speak to us. And how can we know someone who we never let tell us about Himself?

My challenge to myself this week is to take time to listen to God, and I have faith that he will speak to me!

Talking versus Praying

Have you ever noticed (I know I have, that's why I'm asking) that your voice changes when you pray out loud? It doesn't happen when you pray alone or silently, but in a group or a prayer meeting, WOW people can hear that seriousness in your voice! All of a sudden you're using "God talk", remembering verses, phew!
Or are you sitting here thinking, "Oh that's not me. I totally know the kind of people you're talking about though. Those self righteous people."

Ok I want to challenge you on a couple things:

*First, for those of you who know the kind of people I'm talking about: Stop it! Who are we to judge the heart of another person praying? Who's to say what their motive is? We are being self righteous when we think that not praying eloquently means we are somehow more spiritual. God does not want us to pray in a dead way. We are speaking to Him!

*Second, let's all consider our motives when praying out loud. Are we talking just to hear ourselves talk? Or are we really coming in reverence and delighting to speak to our Lord and Savior? Have you ever thought about not praying in a prayer meeting? I know to some of you, this may sound like an excuse to not pray. But I mean it more for those people who pray once, twice, three times in a meeting. If our motives for praying are to appear more righteous to someone else, or to sound good, then we are just Pharisees. If God is putting it on your heart to pray three times, then pray three times! But I think there is also a place for humbly listening to what others are talking to Him about.

*Third, we can talk when we pray. What do I mean by that? Well, something I was thinking about lately is that I don't sound eloquent when I pray. I sometimes have a hard time putting words together, and I sometimes use the wrong word. Sometimes I even insert a 'like' in there! You know what, though, girls? It is not about the words we use. It is about a heart attitude. And that's not saying that the worse we talk, the more holy we must be. But don't be jealous of those who can pray so eloquently! Instead, be encouraged! Come to God with a holy reverence and speak to Him what is on your heart--bring to Him your fears and doubts and praise and questions and everything else. First of all, He already knows it! But a real relationship is just that--real and genuine. Imagine if all your friends came talking to you with British accents and speaking in Victorian language because they thought it would impress you. Would it?

*Lastly, a verse from this morning's reading:

(Mark 1:35) "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where He prayed"

Things that struck me about this: VERY EARLY, He was by Himself, He left the distractions and even His closest friends to go commune with God.

Do I have the same kind of communion with God? Am I seeking Him on my own? With the very best of me? What is my personal prayer life like? Or am I just willing to pray in front of others and get their praise?


P.S. Girls, I hope you know I write these posts because they are things I struggle with. I don't mean to preach sermons or give you the impression I have it all figured out. I don't. Even with praying in groups, I go to all extremes--judging people for talking too long, for being too eloquent, for not being eloquent enough, praying just to hear myself talk, trying to find big words and remember verses so I'll sound more holy...all of the above. So these posts are just thoughts :)

Children of God

Yesterday we read 2 Jn v9 "Anyone who runs ahead and does not continue in the teaching of Christ does not have God; whoever continues in the teaching has both the Father and the Son."

I was really struck by an image as I read this verse...

You have all seen little kids in the store with their parents. They hold their parent's hand until they see something off to the side that distracts them, and then they let go of them and run off to see whatever it is that looks interesting. After a few minutes, they get bored, and they realize they don't know where their parents are...

I was thinking how much this applies to us! As Christian ladies we are holding our heavenly Father's hand, and walking through life. But every once in a while we see something that we cannot get to if we keep holding His hand, and so we let go and run off. Whatever it is quickly becomes boring, and we are convicted to look for God again...and sometimes we have wandered so far away we cannot find Him immediately. And that is when our whole world comes crashing down and we feel lost and abandoned.

But, praise God! He is our Father, and He loves us more than any earthly parent loves their child. And, He is all powerful and all knowing, and HE will never lose us. So take warning and take heart! Don't let go of God's hand in life...stay by His side, because He knows what we really need. But, be encouraged, when we realize we have wandered away, our Heavenly Father knows where we are, and He rejoices in finding His lost sheep.

How Bout Something Super Practical?

Hey girls,

Lately my dad has been challenging me to remember that our money is God's--and we are called to be stewards of that. One thing Pastor does is pray before he spends any money. My question for you is, what do you do (practically) to save money/be a better steward of that money? Please comment in the comments section, or just click on 'edit post' and add to this one! :)

My ideas:

*Bring diet coke to work (~$6 for 12 cans) and leave it in the fridge instead of getting soda at a fast food place (~$2 for 1 drink)...savings? About $15-18 for 12 drinks!

*Have a girls night and do each others' nails while watching a movie instead of going out. Even with pizza, that's about, what? $6 each between 3 people? (or better yet, Papa Murphys...) As compared to $10 movie ticket + $10 dinner + $25 mani/pedi? You save about $40!

*Refill and reuse water bottles

Self-centeredness

Hey Sisters,

Just really quick, I wanted to share something that God spoke to me. Again, through C.S. Lewis ;) (I just finished Surprised by Joy).

Lewis pointed out that there is a difference between being selfish and being self-centered. We can be selfish--taking everything for ourselves, always acting in our own best interests--without being self-centered. And we can be self-centered--Always talking about ourselves, thinking about ourselves, focusing on ourselves, without being selfish. Do you see the difference? And he pointed out that, while both are wrong, it's far less pleasant to be around someone who is self-centered than someone who is just selfish.

Well, this really convicted me, because even though I'm usually (usually, not always) willing to give up something for something else, I'm still always thinking of myself. Pride (seems like everything goes back to pride, huh?)

I know in my friendships I've often been self-centered. I often end up talking about myself--partially because I want to, and partially because I'm too lazy to think of questions to ask the other person.

I tend to see everything by how it relates to me, how it involves me. Instead, I want to forget about myself, and see God and his people.

Hehe, just thought of that song we used to sing in Junior Church:

JOY, JOY, this is what it means:

Jesus first, myself last, and others in between! ;)

Scattered Thoughts

Sometimes I feel like God has taken everything away from me, and I don't get it. I don't understand why I can't have the things that make me happy.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Isn't that so easy to say? And so hard to live out? When friends leave, when earthly comforts seem to be going away, when we don't understand why things happen, it is so hard to live like this verse is true.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

But WHY, God? I want to know why you allow certain things to happen. Why do you allow me to sin? Why do you take things away from me that I consider so dear? Why am I saddened and confused and hurt??

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Oh, I just saw that. In ALL things. In all hurt, God? Really? Because I'm not seeing much good right now. For MY good? I do love you, God. More than everything else? I'm trying God. Sometimes that part is hard.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Your purpose. Got it. Not mine. Because just to let You know, God, (and I know you already know) Your purpose is often not mine. My will wants something else most of the time. Like right now. I want Your will, but I want mine, too. I want Your will to be my will. But that's not right, God. I know. Help me to believe, and help me to surrender!!! Help me to see that I may not know the why, or how things will ultimately be for my good, but help me to see that You are working them out for my good. God, that is the most encouraging promise I have ever heard! Help me to TRUST You in that!!!



Something I was thinking about on the way home tonight...kind of had these thoughts in the form of a prayer.

"God, why do you allow me pain in my friendships with people? I am often disappointed by them. I hate when friends don't keep commitments or don't seem to love me or want to be around me. I hate that most of my friendships are superficial, and I hate that people don't make time for me."

"Jenna, the Best Friend you can have is Jesus Christ."

"God, I know that You say that. But I don't really see it. Plus, I can't have dinner with Him. I can't go on a walk with Him. I can't do anything for Him."

"Jenna. You are called to commune with Him. You are called to walk with Him. I want you to love Me and serve Me and obey My will. This pleases Me."

"Yes, God, but. But what about my friends on earth? I put so much time into some of my friendships; all I want is some kind of response."

"Jenna, that's the point. You put so much time and energy and resources into things and people I have told you will ultimately disappoint. You have put your trust in people who are sinful and faulty. You have invested into relationships that are by nature, temporal. What about Me? How much time have you spent with Me lately? How much have you valued Me? How much have you done to please Me? I have promised to never leave you or forsake you. I have promised to always love you with a real love. I have promised you. I do not change. I do not disappoint. I promise to be here whenever you need Me, day or night. I promise to keep my promises. I promise that if you do what I command, you will be blessed. Could you ask for a better friend? No matter what person you invest in on earth, it will never be as satisfying as a relationship with Me. TRUST Me, Jenna. OBEY Me, Jenna."

How easy is it to pretend that we are loving our friends and not expecting anything from them in return, but then we get angry or self-righteous or indignant or sad or depressed when we don't get anything in return? Christ has promised to be our friend. To be our Savior and Lord. And, that if we follow Him, we will be blessed. Girls, we are told to love as He loved us. What causes us to devalue that love or think that any other kind of love is better?? He is offering that love to us--let's take it!



One more thought:

I think I read this story in an Elisabeth Elliot book...
A woman was struggling between her will and God's will. Which to choose, which to choose...
A wise pastor gave her a piece of paper with two words on it and told her to cross one off, and she would have her answer.
She came back and silently handed him her paper, with neither word crossed off.
On the paper was written "Yes, Lord." We cannot cross off either word and still be in His will. To cross off "Lord" would be to blatantly admit that He is not our Lord--we are not doing His will, we don't care. Yet to cross off "yes", we cannot still call Him Lord.

Surrender

I want to tell you guys a little story. There's not much detail, but I hope you can understand what I'm saying.

I was having my devotions one morning ago and I felt like God was really speaking to me to get rid of idols. I prayed He would show me specific things, because I didn't feel like I had anything huge (materially or physically) that I could give up. God pointed out a box to me that I had in my closet. The box was full of things that on their own were not sinful, but symbolized my idolatry. It was pretty difficult, but I went through the contents of the box and threw everything away.

Nice story, right? Not done. The next morning, God brought to mind something I had recieved as a gift that I needed to give up. "No, God. THAT'S not that big a deal. I don't even think about that very much. It's not important. Plus look, God. It's in its own box. It's hidden from view...out of sight, out of mind." "Jenna, throw it away." "Wait, hold on, God. It's so important to me! I CAN'T give that up! I'll give anything else up! Plus it cost a lot of money. That's wasteful. That's not good stewardship. And it has so much sentimental value. Please don't make me throw that away, God!!"

God brought the following things to mind:
*In Old Testament times, many people hid idols--even think of Jacob's wife Rachel, who tried to hide idols from God, her husband, and her father. Think of how severely God punished those people! He even opened up the earth and swallowed one person and his family! God does NOT tolerate idolatry!

*If it means so much to me that I don't want to give it up, it is an idol.

*If it is in a box, it is no less hidden from God. He is a jealous God, and idolatry sickens Him.

*If I try to pretend it is not important, why can I not give it up?

*If I try to rationalize it, it is probably an idol.

*If I try to hide it, it is probably an idol.

*If I want to keep even 'only' that, it is probably an idol.

Guess what ladies? God gave me grace to throw that item away, and He kept showing me more and I kept throwing them away. God can give you grace to throw out the idols in your life, and He can give you the grace to truly surrender. We learned today in adult Sunday school that the power of grace is greater than the power of sin!

He is mighty to save, our God is MIGHTY to save!
He rose and conquered the grave!

Praise God!

P.S. I'm still learning to surrender. Daily process, daily struggle.

Love you ladies! :)

A Girl's Guide to Marrying Well

Good morning ladies,

Intrigued by the title?

My good friend Anna Tsang just sent me a link to an online Christian magazine, or "webzine"as they are referred to. They have a resource called "A Girl's Guide to Marrying Well." I just opened it, and I am so excited to read it! And actually, I think I might read "A Guy's Guide to Marrying Well" also. You know... just to see what's going on in their minds, and what they're supposed to do in Christian relationships. : )

I'll post in future to let you know what I think. But check it out for yourselves ladies!

http://www.boundlessline.org/2009/07/girls-guide-is-here.html

http://www.boundless.org/girls/pages/GirlsGuide.pdf

Living in Joy

Hi Gals,

With all that has been going on the revival, it seems easy to get caught up in excitement. However, I have really found that I tend to get depressed by how much there is for me to change. And I feel as though, even if I do change, I will have to work hard at it for the rest of my life to live in the way God desires. And it seems like life cannot be happy. But, last night God really spoke to me and showed me...Satan takes away joy, not obedience to God. He deceives us and makes us think, "There cannot be joy in doing God's will." But, praise God! He is more powerful than Satan and He GIVES joy! Even when things are difficult, the Holy Spirit can give us power not only to do them, but also to have JOY in doing.

I don't know if ya'll struggle with this, but I have found great peace in God. And now, when Satan comes to tempt me to get depressed and to feel like I can only obey and never have joy, I can say to him, "The Holy Spirit gives us power to obey quickly, exactly and with JOY." Hope this helps you feel encouraged in a time where a lot of sin is being revealed and a lot of hard work needs to be done to change it.

Prayer Request!

Ladies,

I am really struggling with bitterness. Without going into specifics, I would just really appreciate prayer that God would take it away. I tend to hold grudges or feel more self-righteous if someone has sinned against me and not asked forgiveness, but I NEED TO LET IT GO. And I can't do it on my own (p.s. I've tried) One of the ways this has manifested is not believing the confessions and conversions of others, and not wanting them to have joy while I am still struggling with sin.

Get behind me Satan!!!

Reasons to Be Thankful (just a couple...)

Think your life is hard? Think a breakup is hard? Feeling lost, abandoned, like no one loves you? Lonely? Like life couldn't get harder?

Here are three blogs I think you should look at...

1. The lead singer of Christian group Selah and his wife chose to go through with a pregnancy that they knew would end in a deformed baby who would only live a few hours (if that)
www.audreycaroline.blogspot.com
Then they wrote a song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2CnUtVY35o that includes the lyrics "I will carry you while your heart beats here/ Long beyond the empty cradle/Through the coming years/I will carry you all your life/I will praise the One who chosen me to carry you"! What faith through this!! She is praising God for letting her be the one to carry a terminal baby! Praising God! Not accepting, not adjusting, not crying--PRAISING. What a testimony! The wife's blog is called "Bring The Rain" from a quote that says "And I know there'll be days when life brings me pain. But if that's what it takes to praise you, Jesus bring the rain". Can I say that?? What a challenge! And what glory to God!

2. What if: First, you struggled with infertility. Second, you became pregnant. Third, you feel your baby kick hello for the very first time. The next day, you give birth early to a son who only lives for minutes, and then you find out you have a failing kidney which may have contributed to his health problems?? Would you still praise God? This woman's blog is SUCH a blessing (and she continues to trust God even through an adoption...it's amazing to me that in good times and bad, her attitude toward God NEVER changes!) I want that same kind of peace, trust, and contentment through life's ups and downs! Check it out here:
www.whenhellomeansgoodbye.blogspot.com

3. How about this scenario: You find out near the end of your pregnancy that something is seriously wrong with the baby you are carrying. Your son is born at less than three pounds, and lives for about two years--completely mishapen, deformed, and abnormal. He never grows nearly as big as he should, and every month you feel like the clock is ticking toward his death. He dies, and you find out you're pregnant again soon after. However, you lose that baby halfway through the miscarriage. Would you still praise God?? Read the Gjertsens' story at www.sweetbabyjames.info The verse they chose for their blog is Romans 8:28--"For we know that for those who love God all things work together for God, for those who are called according to His purpose."


Praise God for these corageous, God-fearing women!! I want to be like them!

And, if you need a boost after that, look at another blog where the writer loves God, trusts God after finding out her first pregnancy is QUADRUPLETS, and glorifies God through her joyful, calm, orderly approach to life: www.thelifeofsuz.blogspot.com

Love

"What you tell me about in the nights. That is not love. That is only passion and lust. When you love you wish to do things for. You wish to sacrifice for. You wish to serve."
--Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms

I read this book in my Hemingway and Fitzgerald class this past semester and, while it is not out of the Bible, this quote really stuck with me. First of all, the quote is said by a priest speaking to a disillusioned soldier. He is telling him to turn from the misery of his life and turn to God, to love God. But he's making another really important point: that what we think of as love, is NOT love. The romance of a relationship, the whirlwind of emotions, the lust involved, the physical expressions, the cute cards, the pretty flowers, the dinner dates...that is not love. I got caught up thinking that a lot of that meant love; it doesn't. That doesn't mean I have a good concept of what love is; I don't. But that's why we have an example of true love--

1 John 3:16This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.

In the Hemingway quote and in this verse we see a similar theme: Love is sacrifice. The ultimate example of sacrifice, the ultimate example of love, is Jesus Christ dying for our sins. So what does that mean for us? Well, love isn't relegated to dating/marriage relationships. Christ says,

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself'" (Matthew 22:36-39)

We are to love everyone as we love ourselves. Just think about that for a second. It's so easy for me to say that and for it to not mean anything. Do I give the best of everything to others? If we love God first and foremost, our love for others will come out more. Am I looking out for the needs of others? Seeking to serve and bless others? With siblings and roommates (I'm assuming on this one) it's easy to think of them as 'just' a sister--then serve those I like or want approval from. Yeah, it's easy to get a glass of water for a leader--while I fight with Angela over little things.

What does 1 Cor 13 say about love?

Love is patient-Love waits. Love waits for someone else to go through the door first, love waits while someone slower is holding you up. Love waits with a gracious, kind attitude. Love waits for God's plan in relationships--it does not hurry anything up, it does not delve into sexual sin, it does not try to manipulate a relationship into happening. Love (as women) waits for the man to initiate every step, and Love seeks God's will in that relationship. If we are single, Love patiently embraces singledom--without a hidden agenda of wanting a relationship. Love doesn't say "God I will serve you if/when/after you give me what my heart really desires". Love patiently serves the Lord and waits to see what His will is.

Love is kind-Love speaks with gentle words, with an encouraging spirit, with thoughtfulness. Love is gracious and desires to turn away wrath. Is it kind to criticize someone for their weight, way they dress, funny hairstyle, crooked eyeliner? Is it kind to gossip about someone else, no matter how much we feel justified? Yeah maybe someone did say something rude to me. I can twist it into 'concern' for them as I talk to someone else about it...but that is not Love.

It does not envy- Love does not look at someone else and want what they have. It does not envy a better job, more money, 'better' parents, nicer siblings, work ethic, workout ethic, a better body shape, more confidence, a relationship, a marriage, kids, intelligence, musical ability, better shaped nose, straighter teeth, personality, friends, anything. God gave each of us what He wanted us to have. We are to be content in what we have, and happy for others in what God has given them. Is that as hard for you guys as it is for me?? Some things I envy (purpose in life, direction in life, fulltime job, grad school, etc) can be good things--might even be things God has for me. But if I am not living my life in accordance with His plan and His word to me, I will not reap the full blessings--and by that, I mean I will not have the relationship with Him that I so envy in others. We are commanded to turn FIRST to God and find fulfillment in Him and not worry about temporal things.

It does not boast- This comes in so subtly for me. You guys probably see it clearer in me ;) I used to think that the only people that boast were people who had something to boast about--4.0 GPA, baseball scholarship to school, model good looks, musical genius...Oh no. I tend to boast about how great my life is (even when it's not), how well I'm doing spiritually (even when I'm not), how much I've done/served...or how about these ones? Boasting about how little I have to work, how easy school is, how I'm so changed...Love talks about other people and boasts only in Christ--glory goes to God!

It is not proud- This goes along with boasting. Love humbly considers others better than ourselves. Love for God recognizes that He has put authority in our lives for our benefit, and love submits to those authorities. Love embraces words of correction, discipline, and rebuke and changes.

It is not rude- Love does not put others down, even in a joking way. Love is also not self-depracating--God made me in His image! God wants me to glorify Him. Yes, we are humble and see ourselves as the chief of sinners. But that does not mean we insult ourselves to others--even in our looks. Are we questioning how God made us? Are we questioning the Divine Creator for how He created us? Do we bring glory to God in how we speak to others, or do we laugh at the gifts, personality, or looks He has given them?

It is not self-seeking-Is our welfare our concern? Does it only matter if we get the credit for something? Am I willing to trample down others to get where I want to go? Do I only talk about myself? Love doesn't just not seek self first, it does not seek self at all. Love seeks others out and serves others. Love does not use others, lead others into sin, or manipulate others into doing what we want.

It is not easily angered-Self-explanatory perhaps. But still. Not only unjustified anger. If someone sins against me, am I instantly mad? Or do I return with a gentle word? Do I assume that the other person meant to personally insult me, or do I assume the best about them, that they made a mistake or an ill-timed joke? Do I have think skin and am I sensitive about EVERYTHING? If I am PMSing do I use that as an excuse to get mad?

It keeps no record of wrongs-Love does not hold grudges. Know what grudges turn into? Bitterness. Going through my own heart, I have bitterness and grudges against people who I say I love. Love lets go and forgives. Love remembers how much God sacrificed for us and forgave us for and forgives things that are infinitely smaller in comparison.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth-Love does not get excited when someone else is sinning because it makes me feel better about myself. Love does not invite others to participate in evil with her; Love does not enjoy sinning. Love instead rejoices when someone comes back to Christ, Love cultivates that relationship, Love desires the absolute best for that person. Love prays for enemies, that they will come to know Christ. Have you always looked down on someone in Grace Alive for being weird/obnoxious/boycrazy/worldly? Then what if they become a Christian? Are you rejoicing, or still considering yourself better than them? Are you praising God, or waiting for them to show a false commitment to Christ so you can say "I told you so. I knew it"? Are you happy when someone you've had a problem with 'goes off the deep end' into sin? Does hearing other people confess sin make you more proud of your walk, more disgusted by them...or more thankful God is speaking to them??

It always protects-Love does not lead others into sin. This seems so self-evident but has been a huge problem in my life lately and I cannot say it enough. Do you slyly suggest a friend does not listen to everything her discipler says? Do you convince a friend's sin is not bad enough for her to need to confess? Do you participate in gossip, slander, dishonoring of authority, making light of sin? This is not Love-Love protects a sister's walk with Christ. Do you suggest a shady place to go on Friday nights? Insist on a less-than-pure movie? Suggest a website full of dirty articles or tips on flirting? This is not protecting someone else. In a relationship, is the man protecting your purity? The Bible says a husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the Church--presenting her as holy, without stain or wrinkle. Is he protecting you like this? Is he keeping you from sin? Is he rebuking your sinfulness or showing you areas where you need to change? Or is he always complimenting you, thinking you are perfect? This is not really protecting! Is he encouraging you to love God more? To honor your parents? Is he protecting you from becoming jealous, bitter, angry, or possessive? Ok now we've picked on guys...turn that around on yourself. Are you protective of his purity? Are you wearing clothes to attract guys and cause them to stumble, or clothes that will cause them to see God first? We are called to love our brothers in Christ!

Always trusts- This one gets me every time. ALWAYS, God? Why ALWAYS? Why not just when I feel like it? Trust is a hard topic for me, because I don't really know what it means. But I do think it doesn't mean you see a double-minded, double-living person and trust that because they say they're doing ok, you believe them. But it does mean if you have no reason to believe otherwise, you trust what they say. You aren't always looking for them to fall. But moreover, Love trusts GOD. Trusts God that He has a purpose and a plan for my life. Trusting God that no matter what people disappoint, He is there and He will uphold me if I walk with Him.

Always hopes- Love always hopes for others. Hopes that my friend, who is in sin, will turn to God. Hopes that God will reveal sin. Hopes that God will renew our friendship. Hopes that God grants her the desires of her heart in accordance with His will, no matter how that hurts me or tempts me to be jealous. Hopes that they are serving God. Hopes that (for example with Rachel living in Boston) that they find strong Christian friends and a strong, Biblical church. Love wants the best for others! But again, our ultimate hope is in Christ! That He is almighty to save!

Always perseveres- I am convicted about perseverance. I don't persevere in prayer for my brother's salvation/God's will to be done/my job situation etc etc. I don't naturally want to persevere in my walk with God. But what about relationships and friendships? Am I persevering in praying for my friends? Especially when I tell them I will? Am I persevering in keeping our friendship going? Am I persevering in my walk with Christ so that I may be a blessing to them? Am I an example of Christ's faithfulness to give us strength and grace when we feel like giving up?

Love never fails- Love never gets frustrated by hearing the same story seventy times. Love never fails to forgive. Love never fails to be kind. Love doesn't give up because the friend does not reciprocate. Love doesn't rejoice when the other person sins. Love doesn't fail to be thankful for the other person. Love doesn't fail to correct her friends or to take correction from friends. Love speaks the truth, Love doesn't fail to shine Christ. Love is not selfish, does not hold things back, Love does not fail to serve.

NO MAN has greater love than Christ!

Girls, please don't take this as a sermon. I have no right to tell you how to love, because I myself do not know what love is or how to truly love others. These are just some thoughts I had, and I wanted to write them out. I am so thankful for Christ's love for me, and for your love for me!

Friends

I think in general we've heard some things about friendships lately. For me, it's been "Jenna, you haven't been honest with your friends. You've put on a mask and therefore they aren't real friendships." First of all...wow. That's hard to hear.
A few weeks ago my dad was talking to me about emotions and said "Jenna, you don't even know what true love is. Read 1 Cor 13. That is real love." WOW. That was hard to hear too. So as those are kinda related, and we are to love each other in Christ, I thought I'd share some thoughts about the two subjects...

First, on friends:
Proverbs 12:26A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Am I cautious in friendship? Cautious to not promote sin, gossip, inappropriate joking, myself throughout the whole conversation? When choosing who to spend time with, am I picking people who will build me up or who will let me get away with things?

Proverbs 17:9He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.

We are not perfect. We are going to sin. Our friends are going to sin. But if we cover over the offense (even if they don't ask forgiveness!!) we promote LOVE and keep away bitterness. And then, from our standpoint, we are not to repeatedly offend our friends. Ask forgiveness, then change!

2 Corinthians 7:1Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God

I really liked Rachel's article on modesty. Unfortunately, it wasn't one of those articles I read and say "Yes! That's me right there! I love that article because now I feel good about myself!" Instead, I see how even clothing has made me not pure--and my desire hasn't been for holiness and I haven't had reverence for God. But that's only one example--so much to purge!

James 4:4You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.

It's easy to classify "friendship with the world" as a couple things--an excuse of 'witnessing' to them, a necessary thing...or even to see it only as obviously worldly friends; the ones that get drunk twice a week, sleep around, call themselves atheists, etc. But something that stands out to me in this verse is that it's friendship not with worldly people but with the world--that means anything worldly. Do I spend more time reading about celebrities than I do reading my Bible? That is friendship with the world. Do I look more forward to going out to eat than I do going to church? Those things are not bad in and of themselves (necessarily). But when I put anything worldly in the place of God, it is idolatry and sin, and it makes me an ENEMY of God! My other thought on this is it's so easy to see worldly friendships as just being those who call themselves nonChristians. Then again, there are nonChristians in the church--and I say that being one of those who lived hypocritically for so long! Do we seek out those who share interests of God, or worldly interests? Do we pick 'Christian' friends that let us get away with things, don't confront us, and maybe even support our sin? That, too, is friendship with the world.

2 Peter 3:17Therefore, dear friends, since you already know this, be on your guard so that you may not be carried away by the error of lawless men and fall from your secure position.

I like in this verse, first of all, that Peter calls those he is talking to "dear friends". He has love for the people he is warning and rebuking! In this verse though, my question would be, am I on my guard? It is so easy for me to be proud and think I am strong--I had a good devotions today, yes! I must be doing so well spiritually!--and then the next minute, I am shown how weak and pitiful I am. We are only secure when we trust in Him and find our strength in Him. Yet, I know for me, it is so easy to seek out those who will let me sin, or lead me into sin. I want to be led--but I have not led Christ do the leading. I want to be passive--or, it's more like, I want to sin. I want to be independent--but I need to depend on Christ. But Peter makes it clear there are those "lawless men" who will carry us away if we are not careful.

1 Corinthians 15:33Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character."

I tend to think I am impervious to this--if I recognize who the bad company is, I must be safe from its corruption! But this verse reminds us that we are easily misled. The more time we spend with bad company, the more they corrupt us. So does that mean hole up and enjoy our Christianity by ourselves, never venturing out? No! But practically...are you witnessing to your friends when you are together? No? (first of all, God please change that to a yes in me!) But why do we think we "need" to stay at nonChristian friends' houses till 2 am? Better question, why do we want to? Do we think we are not affected by the sin around us? Do your friends drink and party? It's easy to say "yes, but I have only gone to one party and would never drink as much as them. I only have one drink." Then two months later, after spending time with them, "well, ok I drank more than I meant to but I still only party on weekends and I never drive if I've had too much". How about friends who are loose sexually? "Well I would never..." and then you continue spending a lot of time with them. Do not be misled!! The Bible does not warn us for no reason! How about "Christian" friends? The girl who spends $500 a week on clothes and does not tithe--how easy to fall into the trap of wanting to live a life focused around money without Christ as Lord of that! To make money our lord in that way? How about the "Christian" who is constantly complaining about authority, never has real devotions, tries to control everything...wait! That was me! I want to live a new lifestyle, looking for new friends who will challenge me, be open and honest with me, love God with me, and put God first! Do you?

Love post to come :)

Hi girls,

I got this sermon from my friend Anna. It took me a while to read through, but it's actually really good and challenged my wardrobe! He mentions an online survey regarding women's modesty and men's opinion. I looked at the survey results, and it was really interesting. mk. enjoy.

........

A Heart-Driven Modesty: God and Clothing (Sermon Manuscript)

via RAW CHRISTIANITY by Gunner on 7/26/09

David Gunner Gundersen

This is the manuscript of the sermon I preached tonight at Placerita Baptist Church as part of our SummerFest 2009 series on “Worldliness.” I promised that I would post it here for further consideration and discussion. I have edited a few things that are unnecessary for a blog-post, and some elements will be unique to the sermon-manuscript genre.

Introduction

Under the general category of worldliness, our topic tonight is modesty. I have the unique privilege of preaching a sermon primarily to the ladies. Thanks a lot, PBC elders. Either they think that I’m used to talking about this because I work in the Student Life Department at the college, or they have a twisted desire to see me chopped and skewered by entire pews of offended women. I guess we’ll figure it out once I set foot on the lawn after the service. To up the ante, it’s July, which is the perfect time for a talk on modesty, since summer is traditionally the time to show off, not cover up. But in all seriousness, let me make several preliminary remarks as we begin.

Preliminary Remarks

1. This message is primarily directed to women. I understand that and I embrace it. Yet, it has relevance for all. If you don’t believe me now, I hope you will by the end.
2. Men, we are responsible for our own desires and temptations. We will be talking about how women’s dress and appearance impacts men. But this doesn’t give men an out.
3. Ladies, I will be honest tonight about the minds and thoughts and temptations of men. But please be charitable and don’t walk away assuming that all men are unrestrained, uncontrollable, perverted animals. If you assume this, you will be over-burdened in regards to modesty and you’ll have a cynical view of the men around you.
4. Thank you, ladies of PBC, for your modest dress overall. On the whole, you are honorable, careful, thoughtful, and appropriate in your dress. On behalf of the men, thank you.
5. Nevertheless, be prepared to hear from the Lord tonight. I refuse to be the preacher who says, “Our church is great and you’re all wonderful, so I’m really preaching this sermon to all the other people out there who need to shape up and get it together. Unfortunately, none of them showed up tonight, so you poor perfected souls have to listen to another irrelevant message.” No, tonight is for us. It is for you. Let me tell you one reason why.

This week I returned from a three-week trip to India. Spending three weeks in a vastly different society is one way to guarantee that your Stateside sermon isn’t culture-bound. And spending three weeks in a heavily-clad society is one way to expose the public undressing of American culture. Overall, traditional Indian dress is fairly modest. Clothing generally covers the body, and is generally loose. But the interesting thing is that I did see lots of appalling immodesty in India. Do you know where? On the advertisements in western-imitating malls.

Now, I have been privileged to travel enough that I no longer make America the default punching bag of every post-trip conversation I have. American culture as a whole is not the enemy, as if to say that the customs of India and Africa and Europe are pure as the driven snow. But in this particular area, we are particularly corrupt.

In Titus 1:12, Paul quotes a native cultural expert from the island of Crete who wrote, “Cretans are always liars, evil beasts, lazy gluttons.” How’s that for a generalization and a stereotype? Talk about ethnic profiling and political incorrectness. And if you would allow me to play cultural observer for a moment, I think it would be fair to say that American culture on the whole is sexually-charged, immoral, and immodest.

But it gets worse. We are exporting nakedness. We are educating and tutoring developing countries in the finer details of immorality. We are global champions of immodesty.

So of all the people who need to screw our heads on straight and examine our hearts and possibly cleanse our wardrobes in terms of modesty, it’s us, standing on our beaches and under our billboards and behind our computer screens and in front of our CD covers, standing in the shadow of the stars and bars. There are many reasons why I love America. Modesty is not one of them.

So tonight we want to talk about how we can be citizens of another country, with a different King, with different standards.

Tonight, I want to offer you five exhortations toward modesty. First:

1. Recognize the ultimate need for modesty (Gen 2:25; 3:6-11, 21).

At the beginning of time, directly following the creation of the world, we zoom down into the Garden of Eden, down to ground level, and we see in Genesis 2:25 that “[Adam] and [Eve] were both naked and were not ashamed.” This is very strange. Nakedness without shame. Nuditywithout embarrassment. Immodesty without immorality. This is the world that God created. The fact that it is unimaginable should tell us the immensity of sin and the unthinkable glory of the world to come. In the world as we know it, these are inseparable partners. Nakedness meansshame. Public nudity is defined by embarrassment. Immodesty is intertwined with immorality. But not in the beginning. God created a sinless, guiltless, shameless world.

But it didn’t last. “So when the woman saw that the [forbidden] tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked [immodest]. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths” (Genesis 3:6-7).

Sin produced guilt. Guilt produced shame. Shame requires a covering. Before sin entered the world, there was no guilt. Because there was no guilt, there was no shame. Because there was no shame, there was no need for a covering. Oh, how sin has changed our world!

“And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. But the LORD God called to the man and said to him, ‘Where are you?’ And he said, ‘I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked [immodest], and I hid myself.’ He said, ‘Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?’” (Genesis 3:8-11). God says, no doubt with a deep sadness in His heart, “You’re not supposed to know that you’re naked… You’re not supposed to feel shame! You must’ve sinned…”

“And the LORD God made for Adam and for his wife garments of skins and clothed them” (Genesis 3:21). Sin > Guilt > Shame > Covering. One of the clearest evidences of total depravity is that each and every one of us in this room is covered. Because we are guilty, and we are ashamed. There is a sense in which fashion is simply the ever-changing clothing rack of the guilty. It is our attempt to recreate the beauty of God’s original creation and to hide our own shame.

What did this first sin produce? It marred the interaction between men and women. Men and women were created to be mirrors of God’s glory, but we turned ourselves into magnets for the attraction of others. God made us for reflection, but we wake up in the morning geared forattraction. So come the sparks of sexual fantasy; the slow burn of jealousy; the furnace of adultery; the wildfires of sexual sin. These are all reasons why modesty is now necessary. And we see this play out from the very beginning.

• Potiphar’s wife seduces Joseph (Gen 39:7-20).
• Amnon rapes Tamar (2 Sam 13:1-39).
• Samson and Delilah live out a soap opera (Judges 13-16).
• Solomon has 1,000 sexual partners (1 Kings 11:3).
• God arranges a marriage between a prophet and a prostitute to demonstrate his unparalleled loyalty to His own unfaithful wife (Hosea 1:2).
• The Israelites intermarry with godless pagans (Ezra 9:1-2).
• Herodias’ daughter dances for King Herod’s guests and John is beheaded (Mark 6:17-28).

Women lure and charm men, to their ruin. Men dominate and molest women, to their harm. Men are enticed and seduced. Women are abused and degraded. And it doesn’t stop with the biblical record. We are suffocating under the weight of sin’s consequences to this day. Our feminine heroes are named Madonna and Jolie and Kneightly instead of Carmichael and Edwards and Elliot. Fifty-year-old women have surgeries to look twenty-five. Fifty-year-old men run off with twenty-five-year-old secretaries. Fifteen-year-olds binge and purge. Eight-year-olds are abused by their fathers. The pornography industry runs away with America’s men and America’s soul. Devoted Christian girls spend days trying to find modest clothes to wear while devoted Christian guys fight minute-by-minute against a cultural onslaught of sexual enticement. And we even learn to avoid entire books of the Bible because pure sexual attraction is virtually unintelligible to us.

Recognize the ultimate need for modesty: (1) sin, guilt, and shame, and (2) the marred relationship between men and women. And there is one more practical reason for modesty: men are visual beings. Men are visually attracted, visually distracted, visually stimulated… or visually helped.

Let me restate from the outset that we men have a personal responsibility to guard and control our eyes, our hearts, our minds, and our hands. The call to feminine modesty is not a crutch or an excuse for men, nor is it our main weapon in the battle for purity. We are strangers and aliens living among an evil and adulterous generation. So let’s not pretend like a 40-minute summer sermon on modesty is going to cure all ills, or that the obedience of our tiny Christian minority in the area of modesty is going to be our silver bullet. We must carry our own load here. God is not demanding that women solve men’s problems. But He is calling women to helpand assist. Temptation is already a slippery slope. All we’re asking of you ladies is that you don’t grease the slide.

Review: Recognize the ultimate need for modesty.

2. Embrace the biblical appeal to modesty (1 Peter 3:1-6).

The war for holiness and the war against worldliness does not begin in the mall or the magazines or the walk-in closet. It begins in the mind. Paul writes, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind” (Romans 12:2b). Your mind and your heart and your intentions and your motivations determine your wardrobe.

1 Peter 3:1-6 — “Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives — when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external — the braiding of hair, the wearing of gold, or the putting on of clothing — but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.”

Context: Peter is speaking to Christian women who are married to unbelieving men. He is encouraging these women to be submissive, respectful, and pure so that they might have a wordless testimony before their ungodly husbands. In this context, he urges them to be modest inattitude and in dress, to be women of high character and undistracting appearance. I want to draw out SIX PRINCIPLES about modesty.

(1) Modesty shys away from extravagance (v. 3) (”Do not let your adorning be external — the braiding of hair, the wearing of gold, or the putting on of clothing…”).

Peter is not saying that women should neglect their appearance. Notice that he includes “the putting on of clothing [garments]” in his prohibition. This would mean he’s saying that you can”t wear clothes at all, which would be somewhat antithetical to the call to modesty! No, Peter is saying, “Don’t let clothing and shoes and fashions and accessories and styles be your focus and your obsession.” He’s saying, “Don’t be extravagant and ostentatious and attention-seeking.” He’s saying, “Do not let your adorning — what makes you beautiful — be external.”

Scripture does not speak against the presence of beauty, the enhancement of beauty, or ourattraction to beauty. God made us male and female, and He has designed us to be physically attracted to the opposite sex. He also designed women with the desire and the gifting to make things beautiful. Men destroy things. Women make them beautiful. Bachelor pads aren’t usually warm and inviting. In fact, the main difference between a bachelor pad and a prison cell is the bars. Men can enjoy beauty, but we don’t usuallycultivate it.

The patriarchs (Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob) all married beautiful women (Gen 12:11-15; 25:16; 26:7; 29:16-18, 28). The excellent wife in Proverbs 31 dresses herself and her family in vibrant and quality clothing (31:21-22), and she produces and sells fine, valuable garments (31:24). The bride in Song of Solomon is clearly beautiful in form, appearance, and dress.

Yet, Scripture also says, “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised” (Proverbs 31:30). Outward beauty is ultimately empty and promised to fade. Therefore, the modest woman shys away from distracting, enticing, eye-catching extravagance. Peter is not talking about exposing skin but drawing attention.

Review: Modesty shys away from extravagance (v. 3). In contrast:

(2) Modesty highlights internal character (v. 4) (”but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit…”).

Paul says something very strange in verse 4. He says that “your adorning” — what makes you beautiful — should be invisible. It is a “hidden” beauty, a quiet attractiveness, a gentle loveliness. It is a beauty of the heart. And no matter how many times you’ve heard it, or how cliché it may seem, we need Peter to tell us again: “True beauty begins and centers in the heart.”

The most foundational article of clothing in a godly woman’s wardrobe is her character. The soft tones of a “gentle and quiet spirit.” The perfectly-crafted fabric of a tranquil soul. A well-earned reputation for good works.

#1: Modesty shys away from extravagance (v. 3).
#2: Modesty highlights internal character (v. 4).

(3) Modesty is an imperishable quality (v. 4) (”the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit”).

Everyone look down at what you’re wearing. How old are the clothes you have on? How many of you are wearing clothes that you have personally owned for more than ten years? Clothing wears out.

How many 70-year-old models have you seen on TV recently? How many 80-year-old athletes have you seen running around lately? People wear out.

Why do we have sayings like, “That’s so ’80’s” or “retro” or “blast from the past”? Because the hot new styles of today are the bellbottoms of tomorrow. Fashions change.

For those of you who have been married for more than twenty years, your wedding pictures may be many things — beautiful, precious, memorable — but they are not in style. This is why the older (and wiser) generation often doesn’t care much about style. They have seen it come and go. They understand that fashion is more of a tide than an ocean. It is ever changing, never fixed. Play it cool in 1970 and you will look the fool in 1990.

So should the transitory nature of clothing, appearance, and fashions discourage and dishearten us? Should we be obsessed with anti-aging remedies and keeping up with current styles? No. The suffering Apostle Paul writes, “So we do not lose heart. Though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed day by day” (2 Corinthians 4:16).

The internal character produced by the Holy Spirit and molded throughout life is “imperishable.” This is beauty that does not fade, and cannot be taken — not by physical illness, not by fashion trends, not by cultural shifts; not even by death itself. Do you want permanent, enduring, invincible, constantly-improving beauty? Make investments in yourcharacter. Invest in modesty.

#1: Modesty shys away from extravagance (v. 3).
#2: Modesty highlights internal character (v. 4).
#3: Modesty is an imperishable quality (v. 4).

(4) Modesty is precious in God’s sight (v. 4) (”which in God’s sight is very precious”).

Elsewhere this word “precious” refers to expensive perfume (Mark 14:3) or costly, luxurious garments (1 Tim 2:9). The women who lives with a God-saturated, Christ-imitating, gospel-transformed, Spirit-produced godliness is a treasure to her Father. I have always been fascinated and intrigued by the beautiful relationship between a godly, loving, nurturing, protective father and the daughter that he loves. She is precious to him. Ladies, you are precious to your Father when you live and dress modestly, with a gentle and quiet spirit, with a heart for service, with your soul fixed on the Lord Jesus Christ.

The humble, gentle, tranquil woman of character is precious not only to God but also to God’s men! The woman who dresses appropriately and thoughtfully and with self-control is very attractive to God’s sons. Ladies, ask yourselves: Who am I trying to attract? Whose attention do I hope to catch?

Immodesty is guaranteed to attract the attention of men, but not faithful men. Not dignified men. Not holy men. Not men that you want your sons to be like and your daughters to marry. If a man is enjoying your immodesty or your daughter’s immodesty, he is also enjoying every other woman’s.

Seek the kind of precious and valuable character that God cherishes.

#1: Modesty shys away from extravagance (v. 3).
#2: Modesty highlights internal character (v. 4).
#3: Modesty is an imperishable quality (v. 4).
#4: Modesty is precious in God’s sight (v. 4).

(5) Modesty has a noble heritage (vv. 5-6) (”For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.”)

Notice how Peter attempts to inspire and motivate these Christian women. He asks, “Do you want to stand in the long line of honorable, heroic, praiseworthy, God-exalting women?” Modesty has a noble heritage: “this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves…” The attitude and the apparel of the godly woman have been passed down from generation to generation.

This is equal but opposite to how the fashion industry attempts to motivate. They also want you to imitate. This is what Michelle Obama’s wearing! This is what the runway models in Paris are wearing. This is what J. Crew and Hollister are selling. Don’t you want to be like them? Now, again, what some of these women are wearing and what some of these catalogues are selling may not be wrong at all. It could be very feminine and appropriate. But are you more moved by the example of the godly women of the faith than by current trends and fashions?

I would encourage you to read Christian biographies about noble women of the faith. One thing you’ll notice: they weren’t known for the size of their closets or the in-ness of their styles. They were known for adorning themselves with “good works” as Paul urges (1 Tim 2:10).

What characterized these women?

a. They were unattached to the world. They were “holy women.” The overall, lifetime decision to separate from the world’s values and the world’s ways has massive implications. Dress is just one of them. The way a woman dresses is a declaration of allegiance. To whom have you pledged your life? Do you look just like the culture, or is your attitude, your behavior, and your wardrobe distinct? This doesn’t mean that you are deliberately out of stepor anti-fashion or intentionally and militantly against the current trends. There’s a way to draw attention to yourself by being completely out of step and trying to stand out for your conservatism. Nevertheless, you should stand out for something. When you dress yourself in the morning, you are wrapping yourself in a flag. You are representing a kingdom.

b. They had a God-centered hope. They were “holy women who hoped in God.” Women are naturally designed to hope and desire and anticipate. Peter is speaking to Christian women with unbelieving husbands, so their husbands likely do not provide them with the kind of security and love and leadership and attention that they might desire. Nevertheless, they set their hope on God. Modesty hopes in the love and pleasure and provision of God, not the love and pleasure and provision of men. Ask yourself when you dress, “What am I hopingfor?”

Who are you trying to imitate? Who do you want to look like? Whose appearance fascinates and captivates you? Modesty has a noble heritage, and it is a legacy worth joining.

#1: Modesty shys away from extravagance (v. 3).
#2: Modesty highlights internal character (v. 4).
#3: Modesty is an imperishable quality (v. 4).
#4: Modesty is precious in God’s sight (v. 4).
#5: Modesty has a noble heritage (vv. 5-6).

(6) Modesty has evangelistic power (vv. 1-2) (”won without a word by the conduct of their wives”).

Remember that Peter is still talking to Christian women with unbelieving husbands, and encouraging them to maintain a wordless testimony so that their husbands might come to know the Lord. In the words of one commentator, Peter is promoting an “eloquent silence” (J. N. D. Kelly, The Epistles of Peter and of Jude, 128). Part of this testimony is external and internal modesty. Peter is saying that Christian modesty is an evangelistic strategy. Feminine modesty helps fulfill the Great Commission! We go to the jungles of Papua New Guinea; we penetrate the dark corners of the Middle East; and we dress modestly in Valencia. These are all missional strategies in Scripture.

Do you have a heart for the lost? Do you want to see people saved? Do you want to see the gospel advance? Then live and dress modestly! Modest character has a quiet power. It is so attractive and persuasive and winsome in a dark, desperate, competitive, self-conscious, attention-seeking world like ours. The women of the world dress so that men will see throughtheir clothing. The women of God dress so that men will see past their clothing to theirtransformed character. Modesty has evangelistic power.

Six Principles about Modesty from 1 Peter 3:1-6:
#1: Modesty shys away from extravagance (v. 3).
#2: Modesty highlights internal character (v. 4).
#3: Modesty is an imperishable quality (v. 4).
#4: Modesty is precious in God’s sight (v. 4).
#5: Modesty has a noble heritage (vv. 5-6).
#6: Modesty has evangelistic power (vv. 5-6)

REVIEW:
1. Recognize the ultimate need for modesty (Gen 2-3).
2. Embrace the biblical appeal to modesty (1 Peter 3:1-6).

3. Discover the diverse implications of immodesty (Proverbs 14:12).

“There is a way which seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death” (Proverbs 14:12; 16:25).

Jesus said, “Woe to the world for temptations to sin! For it is necessary that temptations to come, but woe to the one by whom the temptations come!” (Matthew 18:7).

Here are seven potential or actual consequences of immodesty:

(1) You might tempt a husband to be discontent with his wife’s physical appearance. This would be dangerously close to what Jesus calls adultery in Matthew 5:27-28 — “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.’ Yes, it’s the man’s responsibility to control his own eyes, mind, and heart — absolutely. But you can help or hinder. Yes, a man might not commit adultery with you personally, but you might be step #13 along the way.

(2) You might tempt a single young man toward immoral sexual desires. Besides his own sin in lusting, he is also setting up pitfalls for himself later on — discontentment, a memory bank of immodest girls, a decreasing standard of what he’s looking for in a girl, etc.

(3) You could tempt other girls to covet your looks or your clothing or the attention you receive. Yes, they are responsible to battle envy in their own hearts, but if their battle is stirred up by your immodesty and attention-seeking, you are hindering them and not helping.

(4) You might distract people from seeing Christ in you. If people walk away from you and only think, “She’s cute and she’s got great style,” you have missed an opportunity to represent Christ. This doesn’t mean that it’s wrong to be noticed for your beauty. But if it’s the consistent theme and feedback of your life, something might be missing.

(5) You might distract the people of God from worshiping with the gathered church. Singing, listening to God’s Word, meditating, fellowshiping without distractions. I’ve been in churches before where I find myself often looking to the heavens, and not because I’m really looking to the heavens. I’m trying to avoid what’s on earth.

(6) You might teach other girls around you to develop immodest habits. Ask yourself if you would want a fourteen-year-old girl looking to you as the model for how to dress. If you are a fourteen-year-old girl, ask yourself if you would want your 10-year-old sister following your example.

(7) You will attract the wrong kind of man.

REVIEW:
1. Recognize the ultimate need for modesty (Gen 2-3).
2. Embrace the biblical appeal to modesty (1 Peter 3:1-6).
3. Discover the diverse implications of immodesty (Proverbs 14:12).

4. Develop the spiritual discernment of modesty.

Ladies, learn to think, shop, act, and dress like God’s daughters. Men, view the ladies around you as God’s daughters.

Here are four questions that you ladies can ask yourself about your clothing, your appearance, and your motivations:

(1) Why do I want to purchase or wear this?

• • Am I seeking the pleasure of God or the attention of men
  • Do I really need this? You could feed and educate three children a month for the price of a nice blouse from the TownCenter. This doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t buy the blouse. But it raises some good questions about how we spend our money.
  • Is my heart becoming entangled with the cares of the world?
  • Are there any particular guys whose attention I want to catch, or any particular girls that I’d like to envy me?
  • Am I willing to say no to purchasing this or wearing this?
  • Am I becoming a hyper-critical, judgmental, condescending, conscience-stricken, anti-beauty legalist? As much as we men want you to be modest, we also want you to be feminine and to maintain your beauty. I mean, on top of everything else, my wife is the best decoration in the house, to be quite frank. So I don’t want her enslaved or over-burdened by unbiblical conservative values. Nor does these types of overly strict, man-made rules please or honor God or cultivate a true heart of humble modesty

(2) How will my appearance affect others?

• • Will I manifest appropriate feminine beauty?
  • Will I bring undue attention to myself?
  • Will I be a distraction, or worse, a stumbling block?
  • How will this look when I’m sitting down or bending over? Modesty doesn’t mean that your skirt is modest in one position out of ten. Ask yourself, “Will I need to constantly pull this up or down or adjust in my seat to be modest?”
  • What do my husband, parents, wise leaders, and mature friends say? We fathers have a very serious responsibility to instruct, guide, and help our daughters with their hearts and their clothing choices. Every dad should say at some point, “I’m sorry, honey, but you can’t go out of the house wearing that.” “I’m sorry, honey, but I can’t let you wear that because of how men will look at you.” “I’m sorry, honey, but you’re a grown teenage girl and that’s not appropriate to wear in the house even around family.”
  • Am I willing to err on the side of caution

(3) What does my appearance say about me?

• • Who and what am I identifying with?
  • What does this say about my priorities?
  • What am I becoming known for? “Good looks or good works”? My “clothing or my character”? My fashion or my spiritual fruit? (C. J. Mahaney, “God, My Heart, and Clothes,” Worldliness, 135).
  • What do my receipts from this year say about my priorities? What about the time, energy, and thought that I put into my appearance? How about the amount of clothes, shoes, make-up, and accessories I own?
  • Am I becoming enslaved to being “counter-cultural” in unbiblical ways? Again, legalism and over-restrictive convictions are also a danger

(4) What kind of example am I setting for others?

My children? My friends? Would I want my young daughter to wear what I’m wearing?

Now, when we talk about developing the spiritual discernment of modesty, I understand that there’s one particular question here that can be very difficult to answer. It’s #2: How will my appearance affect others? We want to be practical, but not legalistic. We want to be specific, but not inappropriate. You ladies may be rightfully and righteously interested in what’s helpful and what’s hurtful when it comes to your brothers in Christ. But how can you find out?

I want to introduce you to a very helpful online survey that was done by the Harris brothers. “The Modesty Survey is an exciting, anonymous discussion between Christian guys and girls who care about modesty. Hundreds of Christian girls contributed to the 148-question survey and over 1,600 Christian guys submitted 150,000+ answers, including 25,000 text responses, over a 20-day period in January 2007.” The responders were 43% homeschoolers, 40% public schoolers, and 13% private schoolers. 45% were college graduates and 14% were college students. The average age was 22½.

They wisely provide seven guidelines as an introduction to the survey. The first three are absolutely essential for our purposes tonight.

(1) Please, approach the survey as a resource, not a list of rules.
(2) Always honor your parents above the results of the survey (Ephesians 6:1-3).
(3) Seek personal feedback on your attire from the godly men and women in your life.
(4) Remember, modesty is first and foremost a matter of the heart, not the wardrobe.
(5) Faithfully pursue the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:4).
(6) Let your good works outshine your outward appearance (1 Timothy 2:10).
(7) Dress for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31).

The survey is specific and comprehensive. Here are the categories:

(1) General/Other
(2) Swimsuits
(3) Undergarments
(4) Shirts/Dresses
(5) Layering
(6) Pants/Shorts/Leggings
(7) Skirts
(8) Posture/Movement
(9) Makeup/Jewelry/Hair/Shoes
(10) Open Questions

And here are some of the answers. Again, these are not scriptural commands or even biblical guidelines. They are simply the results of this survey, informed by your fellow believers, both men and women. The statements in quotes are the questions of the survey. This is just a sampling.

• “Girls can dress attractively without being immodest.” 97% agree.
• “A guy can consider a girl attractive without thinking about her in an impure way.” 95% agree.
• “Sleeveless shirts or dresses (i.e. bare arms) are immodest.” 61% disagree, 18% neutral, 21% agree.
• “Dresses that are fitted at the waist (e.g. with a belt or waistband) are a stumbling block.” 78% disagree.
• “Spaghetti-strap shirts and dresses are immodest.” 61% agree, 20% disagree, 19% neutral.
• “The same standards of modesty should apply to wedding and bridesmaids’ dresses as to everyday attire.” 65% agree.
• “Wearing pants with words across the backside is a stumbling block.” 84% agree.
• “It is immodest for a girl to expose her calves (i.e. knee downward).” 83% disagree, 10% neutral, 7% agree.
• “Skirts that fall above the knee are immodest.” 58% agree, 19% neutral, 23% disagree. One commenter put it well: “That’s getting into dangerous territory, especially when [women] sit down.” And know that 93% of responders said that “Miniskirts are immodest.”

REVIEW:
1. Recognize the ultimate need for modesty (Gen 2-3).
2. Embrace the biblical appeal to modesty (1 Peter 3:1-6).
3. Discover the diverse implications of immodesty (Proverbs 14:12).
4. Develop the spiritual discernment of modesty.

5. Embrace the ultimate solution for immodesty (Psalm 32:1).

My ultimate need is not more clothing or better clothing. My ultimate need is not even a gentle and quiet spirit or a life of good works or a God-honoring wardrobe. I need righteousness. The ultimate solution for immodesty is the gospel.

Psalm 32:1 — “Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered.”

The righteousness of Christ has covered us, and we are now to dress as those who desire to make people notice that righteousness. We want people to see that God has clothed us, not that the GAP has clothed us or that Hollister has clothed us or that Calvin Klein has clothed us or that J. Crew has clothed us. We are wearing Christ. Let it be known.

Christ was clothed with a mocking purple robe and a crown of thorns so that I might wear His righteousness (Mark 15:17). And Christ was undressed and uncovered and exposed on the cross so that my sin and my shame might be covered (Luke 23:34).

God dresses His Son in my wickedness so that I might be dressed in His righteousness. God stripped His Son of His glory so that I might be brought into the freedom of the glory of the children of God. Christ paid in blood for my clothing.

And because the gospel is the ultimate solution for our widespread and comprehensiveimmodesty, it is also the ultimate motivation for our widespread and comprehensive modesty. I want my life to adorn the gospel! The gospel has clothed us, and now we want to clothe the gospel. The gospel is making us beautiful once again, and now we want to make the gospel beautiful. We want our lives to dress up the gospel, to make it attractive, to entice people to Christ’s forgiveness and His transforming power. We want to live in such a way that others are attracted to Jesus Christ.

So when you browse the clothing racks at your favorite store… when you slide your clothes off their hangers in the morning… when you stand readying yourself for the day in front of the full-length mirror… when you walk out the door in the morning… when you set foot on your high school campus… when you walk around the house in front of your young daughters and sons… when you pass through the double doors of the PBC sanctuary… you are dressing up the gospel. Do it beautifully.

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Resources

I have listened to “The Soul of Modesty,” read Mahaney’s chapter in Worldliness, read most ofChristian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America, and perused the “Modesty Survey” at length, but have not heard any of Rick Holland’s messages below. But I trust and recommend Rick’s messages because he is consistently biblical, practical, and persuasive.

• Modesty Survey: This very helpful, specific, comprehensive survey (mentioned above) includes links to several helpful articles.
• Sermon: “The Soul of Modesty” by C. J. Mahaney, also transcripted in chapter five of the book Worldliness, entitled “God, My Heart, and Clothes” (117-38) (free PDF online).
• Sermon: “God’s Expectations for a Christian Woman’s Clothing (Part 1)” by Rick Holland (1 Tim 2:9-10)
• Sermon: “God’s Expectations for a Christian Woman’s Clothing (Part 2)” by Rick Holland (1 Pet 3:1-6)
• Sermon: “A Modest Proposal, Part 1: A Theology of Modesty” by Rick Holland (Selected Scriptures)
• Sermon: “A Modest Proposal, Part 2: Biblical Expectations for Modesty” by Rick Holland (1 Tim 2:9-10)
• Sermon: “A Modest Proposal, Part 3: Reflecting and Promoting the Glory of God” by Rick Holland (Selected Scriptures)
• Resource: “Modesty Heart Check” (free download) by Carolyn Mahaney and daughters Nicole Whitacre, Kristin Chesemore, and Janelle Bradshaw.
• Booklet: Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America by Jeff Pollard — This is a conservative, bold, well-researched booklet about the fashion industry’s deliberate undressing of America and the church’s naive following.